I know, I know, the title of the article might be triggering to some...but...I promised to always keep it real with you guys, so sorry not sorry because I think this topic is SO important!

I want to start off by saying that we’ve all been guilty of these things before, myself included. We’re human. We have bad days, rough seasons, and have all had to learn from mistakes in this area. And it is OKAY to have bad days and make mistakes that we have to learn from, apologize for, and move forward from. That’s how we grow...

But for some folks...those bad days or moments become an entire lifestyle, and that’s where we’ve got a big problem - because these toxic traits will not only hurt your life but also can seriously damage your acting career.

Because the truth is - people want to work with good people. The folks at the top of the food chain in this industry can work with ANYONE they want to. And we have heard many of them say time and time again that they don’t care how talented you are if you’re not a good human to be around. Talent is a dime a dozen. Talent and being wonderful to be around and work with is much more rare. So turning toxic habits into a lifestyle will come back to bite you and I don’t want that! 

And that’s why today I’m putting on my loving big sister hat and walking you through 10 signs you might be a toxic actor. Prefer to listen to your content? Check out the podcast version of this article here.

10 unhealthy actor habits

1. You only talk about acting. This is a sign of obsession and lack of balance which can only lead to unhealthy behaviors.

2. You compare yourself to other actors constantly. When you hyper focus on other people’s careers, you’re wasting precious time that could be well-spent on your own. Comparisonitis is very real, very contagious, and frankly, not classy. Stay in your lane.

3. Introduce other actors only by what credits they have. We all hate it when family and friends ask us what movies or TV shows they can see us in, right? So why do we think that it’s kind to introduce other actors at events and parties by what they’ve been in. Let’s focus on personal qualities instead of bookings when it comes to creating community.

4. Only reach out to others in the community for personal gain. If you’re only out for yourself, people will begin to notice and lose trust in you. Pay people for their time and mentorship. Seek genuine connections. Don’t reduce yourself to being shallow or chasing the “popular” crowd just to try to get a leg up in your career. It’s tacky.

5. Never truly feel happy for other actor’s wins. It’s okay to feel your feelings, but if you find you are NEVER truly celebrating other actor’s wins…or only cheer on the actors who are in different types than you…we’ve got a lot of personal growth work to do.

6. You need to know all the latest drama in your market. Again…do you really have time to be worrying about everyone else’s business? Not if you want to be successful. Besides, chasing the hot gossip creates a very negative energy that in no way is serving you, your career, or the community.

7. Complain about not being invited to things, but you never invite anyone else to things either. Stop waiting for connection. Stop viewing “certain groups” of actors as the most desirable to hang out with. Focus on finding a tribe that’s right for you. And be bold and brave to make that first move to invite actor friends to coffee or an outing.

8. Ask what everyone is auditioning for. If you’re leading every actor-interaction with this, you’re doing it wrong. While in certain scenarios, it’s fine to inquire, in most, it’s actually quite unnecessary and doesn’t lead to building strong, trust-centered relationships.

9. Always concerned your team isn’t doing enough because that’s safer than taking action to figure it out. It’s true, sometimes there is a disconnect between talent and agents. But have you reached out to ask key questions? Have you set a meeting to discuss? Have you asked if there’s anything you can improve on? Are you seeking new reps if that’s determined to be necessary? Actors who blame others instead of taking action and responsibility tend to talk and complain a lot more than they work.

10. Have no friends outside the industry. Balance is key. We love our acting community friends, but too much of a good thing can get dicey. Having friends and parts of your life outside the industry helps you maintain perspective and balance in your life. And, they’re more likely to call you out when some of these bad habits kick in.

If you read these and it resonates with you...I hope you first take a deep breath and choose to keep your mind and heart open instead of shutting down. Choose to take that little voice in your head that says, “whoa that might be me!” as a sign to take some time to really check in with yourself on a deep level. 

Recenter on your “why”, your priorities in this life, and ask yourself if you are proud of the way you’re moving through this career. Ask yourself if your daily habits, thoughts, and behaviors are healthy and making you the person you want to be. 

It might be a really illuminating experience that could lead to some positive changes! And as always when it comes to personal growth, there is never any shame in seeking support from a professional. I mean, heck, just like you’ve trained for hundreds of hours in acting, they’ve done the same to school up on brains and emotions and this hard life stuff, so they could really help! 

Here’s to continuing to grow into the best actors, and people, we can be.